Hope for the best but prepare for the worst

I have recently updated my will… I hadn’t bothered for ages even though the last one I did was seriously out of date and I now had my daughter. The thing that brought me up short was the realisation that if me and my husband had a fatal accident, how would our respective families know what our wishes were in respect of our daughter?

The last thing our families need is the huge decision as to who would look after her. With my family in Liverpool and my husband’s in Scotland – this would be a nightmare and has the capacity to cause huge conflict.

So I set about updating my will and putting together a very long list of wishes as to how her guardian should bring up our child. It saves the guardian trying to second guess what we would have wanted.

Going through this process is quite weird but it gives you so much power to have your wishes set out in black and white and know that they will need to be taken into account should the worst happen.

Whilst I was at it I decided to do a lasting power of attorney (LPA) for finances and for health and welfare. Both documents allow someone you nominate and trust to act as your attorney should you lose the capacity to make decisions for yourself.

A lot of people don’t bother with the health and welfare in the hope that their family will automatically know what they would want. But what about what you would like to be fed? I can’t bear the thought of being given tinned tomatoes. What happens if I suffer a serious accident and I am effectively brain dead? Do I really want my family to have the decision to switch me off? No, I would rather make that decision now so they don’t have to…

The saying, “Hope for the best but prepare for the worst” springs to mind.